Missing Scene
by insertsnarkhere
Summary: Missing scene from ‘Knocked Up’
1. Chapter 1

Summary: Missing scene from 'Knocked Up'

Disclaimer: Property of Marvel and Fox and Stan Lee and blah blah blah…

Probably would help if you read 'Knocked Up' first so you get where this story fits in.

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_Scene where Logan goes temporarily blind… Heheheh…_

* * *

They were standing against a wall – Rogue with her back to it, John leaning in close.

He has his hands cupping her face delicately but firmly. She giggled against his mouth as he gave her quick little pecks before finally settling on her lips fully. Moaning quietly, she wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him closer as the kiss deepened and tongues became entwined. His hands fall away from her face to hold her waist, pressing her against him and away from the wall.

"Oh my God, you guys! Get a room!" Jubilee said in mock disgust as she and Kitty came upon the couple in the hallway. 

John lifted his head quickly, a surprised look on his face. Rogue flushed deeply, trying to hide herself against her boyfriend. 

The two girls snickered as they passed, each of them giving Rogue and John lascivious looks and wriggling their eyebrows in a knowing fashion.

They watched as Jubilee and Kitty rounded the corner, still snickering, and disappeared from sight. 

"For the first time in my life, I think we should actually listen to Jubilee," John said, nuzzling against her cheek. "So? Should we 'get a room'?

Rogue looked at him, her lips curving up in a satisfied way that reminded John of a cat who just swallowed a canary. He felt her hands slowly grope their way over his shoulders, down his arms and finally to his hands which she grabbed roughly. 

"Let's go then…" she said with a wink. 

He laughed as he let her guide him by both hands back to their room. 

She opened the door quickly, pulling him in with a tug. He shut the door behind him with a kick, also making sure to latch the lock. 

"So…how are we doing this?" She helped him pull his black t-shirt over his head. "Bed? Desk? Floor? Wall? Shower? Bathroom counter? Or…chair?"

He smirked, tracing a finger over her now over-exposed décolletage. "Chair, huh?"

"We haven't christened them yet…" She bit her lip from groaning too loudly, her shirt falling away. His fingers now hooked into her bra straps and lowered them slowly. "And we have three of them… Should get started… Mmm…"

He left open-mouth kisses over her bare shoulders as she continued her incoherent babble about the chairs. She only stopped talking when her pink lace bra fell away and the tips of her breasts were brushing against his bare skin. 

"Which one?" he mumbled against her neck, his hands playing under her short skirt.

"Huh?"

"Which chair should we christen first?"

She tried to open her eyes but it was oh-so hard to focus when he was doing that thing with his tongue against the shell of her ear. She nodded over to the closest chair. "Um…that one…" 

They stumble their way over the short distance to the rather uncomfortable looking wooden chair next to the desk. Uncomfortable but still the nearest – and she was in desperate need of him. She helped him undo his jeans, letting them fall to his ankles so he could step out of them. She gasped when she felt his hands rip away her panties from under her skirt, throwing them out of the way with a big grin on his face. 

He grabbed at her hips before sitting down on the chair while she straddled his lap. She shoved his boxers down and lifted her skirt up. They don't bother with condoms – it would take too much time to find one and it was already much too late to think about unplanned pregnancies.

And then she felt him slip inside of her and…

…it was good.

"John…John…John…" she chanted with each thrust and bounce. "Mmm…right there… Don't stop… Oh God, so good…"

Now that they had their own room and everyone knew about their relationship, she became more and more vocal during their lovemaking. Not just with the usual moans and groans and grunts but with very loud shouts about what he was doing right, where she liked to be touched, how she wanted it, and, by God, John was more than pleasantly surprised to learn what a colorful and filthy vocabulary she had when she was about to orgasm.

She let out a piercing cry when she felt him hit a particularly sensitive spot. 

The lust-filled haze that clouded both of their heads cleared slightly when they heard the banging and thumping on their door. "Rogue? Rogue?! Are you okay?"

"Don't come in…" she tried to yell out. But it took all her concentration to keep her thighs tight around his hips and her mouth was busy leaving wet kisses against his neck. 

"Rogue! Open the door! Are you okay?" The shouting became more frantic. John and Rogue don't even notice when the door hinges start to tremble under the weight of someone banging against it with all their might. "Open the door, Rogue!"

"Don't come in!" she shouted right before her throat closed up again, her eyes scrunched shut, her emotions on a wild rollercoaster. She couldn't stop herself from crying out again, the pleasure becoming too intense.

"Rogue!! a panicked yell coming through from the other side of the door.

"Don't come in!" she yelled again. 

She was so close; nothing was going to stop her. She huskily said into his ear, "Do you feel that? You like that? I know you like it because I like it too. I like it when you're inside of me and fucking me. Fucking me so hard… Yeah…like that… Fuck me, John. Fuck me…fuck me hard…"

Just as she reached her peak, her hands tightly clutched his shoulders and her back arched painfully. She slumped over John, her hair partially covering his chest and face. Both of them panting hard and flushed with spent passion. They don't notice when the door burst open through sheer force and will.

"Oh Jesus fucking Christ! I'm blind! I'm blind!" Logan screamed shrilly, his hands covering his eyes when he realized exactly why Rogue had been crying out. And it would disturb him much much later to remember that they were both still wearing their shoes and that (_going blind again just from the thought!_) they were sitting in a chair.

If Logan hadn't been covering his eyes like a frightened schoolboy, he would have seen John and Rogue comedically fall out of the chair – John trying to shield Rogue by taking the brunt of the fall. 

"What the hell is going on?" someone yelled from the hallway. 

"I heard someone yelling they were blind?" 

As more and more people started to gather, Rogue frantically reached up from the floor to grab the sheet off of the bed. She tried to cover herself and John from the probing eyes in the doorway.

"Rogue? Is that you?" Jubilee called out, her eyes as big as saucers. 

Rogue looked up from her awkward position, still on top of John. "Uh…hi…"

"Damn, girl… You gotta tell me your secret…" Jubilee grinned like the Cheshire cat, her foot nudging slightly at the pink bra and the black t-shirt that was thrown carelessly by the now broken door. "On how to freak Logan out like that, I mean." 

Logan was still screaming shrilly.

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A/N: More? Write more missing scenes? Y/N? 


	2. Chapter 2

_Scene where John shows Pietro how to swaddle a baby…_

--

Pietro opened the door after a brief knock. "'Dyce? You in there?"

He saw his friend sitting at the desk, writing furiously into one of his notebooks. "Are you doing homework? On a Friday night? What the fuck, man?"

"Not now, Pietro…" John waved him away with his free hand, not even bothering to look up from his work. "I gotta finish this…"

"Not now? Come on, man! It's Friday night! Let's do something! Sam and Dom are waiting downstairs!"

"I can't… I really have to finish this. And besides that, I can't go out with you guys anyways. Rogue's got something planned tonight."

Pietro sighed heavily, dropping into the chair (no, not _that _one) next to his friend. "Jesus Christ…I never thought I'd live to see this day."

"See what day?" John finished writing and finally looked over at his friend.

"John Allerdyce, married man."

"What the hell are you talking about? Me and Rogue aren't married."

"Dude…a) you're working on a Friday, b) you're ditching your best mates to go do something with your girl, c) – and this probably the most important part of all – you guys are having a baby! In my book, that's married life." Pietro waited for his friend to deny it…and waited. "Well?"

John shrugged, closing his notebook. "What can I say?"

"God…you've changed, man. Where's the John Allerdyce I used to know? The one who could go drinking and chasing girls all night?"

"People change, Pietro… I've got responsibilities now…and you know I don't shirk on them."

"Yeah, I know…but damn…"

They were both silent, staring aimlessly at the wall in front of them.

"So…" Pietro started awkwardly. "You wanna do something tomorrow?"

John had a sheepish look on his face. "Err…sorry, man. We got the baby class tomorrow…"

"Oh, yeah…" Pietro tapped his fingers on the desktop impatiently. "What do you guys do in that class anyways?"

John laughed, sometimes he wondered about his friend and what might be going on in his head. "What do you mean 'what do we do'? Dr McCoy is teaching us stuff for the baby."

"Show me."

"What?"

"Show me what you've learned. I wanna know."

"Pietro…"

"No, really, I wanna know. I mean, if I'm gonna be godfather and everything, I should know some things about babies, right?"

John chuckled. "Hate to burst your bubble again, but you might be second in line for that godfather job. I think Rogue has her heart set on naming a certain Wolverine for that duty."

"Well…unofficial godfather then… So you gonna show something or what?"

"Err…well…let's see…" John contemplated for a moment. "You wanna know how to change a diaper?"

"No way, man! What? So you can pass off the piss and poops to me? No thanks!"

"All right! All right!" John thought for another moment, his eyes roaming the room…for inspiration. "I know. I'll show how to swaddle. Come over here."

John gave Pietro's shirtsleeve a tug before walking over to the bedside. John reached over to grab a blanket and what Pietro thought at first was a pillow. As he walked over to the bedside to stand next to John, he realized it wasn't a pillow. It had two pointy ears, big black circles for eyes, a button nose, even a bright red bow on its ear, but, most sinister of all, Pietro thought, no sign of a mouth. At all.

"What the fuck is that thing?" Pietro exclaimed, rather wildly.

"Calm down… Geez…it's like you've never seen Hello Kitty before…"

"What the hell is a Hello Kitty?"

John rolled his eyes. "Jesus, Pietro, haven't you ever seen some of the stuff Wanda carries around with her?"

"Wanda has this shit?"

"Do you even know your own sister?"

Pietro just gave him a blank stare – the one he usually put on when a teacher asked him a question he didn't know the answer to.

"Never mind… Just watch and learn, all right?" John laid the blanket down on the bed then folded the top-right corner a few inches. He placed the Hello Kitty pillow in the middle with her head on the fold. "Now, listen up and look closely, you pull the corner near the baby's left hand across her body, and tuck the leading edge under her back on the right side under the arm. Like this, okay? Pull the bottom corner up under the baby's chin. Bring the loose corner over the baby's right arm and tuck it under the back on her left side. If she prefers to have her arms free, you can swaddle her under the arms. That gives her access to her hands and fingers." He turned to Pietro after he was done, that same blank stare still on his friend's face. "You gettin' this?"

"Erm…maybe you should show it to me again."

They practiced like that for the next half hour…or, at least, until Pietro stopped being freaked out by the no-mouth kitty staring back at him.

"This is kinda fun…" Pietro grinned, a mischievous look coming over his face. "Just make sure that when your baby's born, it has a mouth, okay?"

"Thanks for the advice."

"Hey, I'm good for all kinds of things!" Pietro replied, laughing along with his friend. The laughter died slowly when Pietro turned somber. "Listen, man, I'm sorry about earlier…"

"Don't worry about it…"

"No, no…I'm happy for you guys. Really. I just can't believe you're going to be a frickin' dad, dude."

They grinned at each other before Pietro broke the rather comfortable silence. "Oh, come here, you…"

Pietro grabbed John in a big bear hug, practically squeezing the breath out of him.

Sam and Dominic choose that moment to open the door, startled by the sight that greeted them.

"Err…you guys having a Brokeback moment or something?"


	3. Chapter 3

_John sings 'Bootylicious' when he thinks Rogue is still asleep_

--

He opened one eye then the other when he saw that Rogue was sleeping peacefully. He shifted slightly, slowly sliding his arm from under Rogue's head. He bit back a chuckle when she whimpered slightly at the loss of her 'pillow'. For some reason she liked using _him_ as her own personal pillow, never mind that perfectly good and fluffy ones always surrounded them.

She shifted onto her back, settling grumpily with her eyes still closed against regular feather-down pillows. When he could hear her breathe evenly and deeply, he knew she was in a deep sleep again.

He grinned widely then scooted down the bed so that his face was almost even with the top of her protruding stomach, placing a hand over the rounded curve.

"Hey, little one… It's your dad. I hope you're having a good time in there and that you didn't mind the seven thousand chili dogs your mother ate yesterday." He chuckled when he felt a small kick against his hand. "Not too good, huh? She probably overdid it with the onions… I guess I'll be seeing you in a few weeks…then you can tell your mother exactly what you think about her eating habits. But in the meantime… I'm still not sure why you love this song so much and not the other ones I actually know…"

He looked up to see she was still asleep – her lips parted, her chest rising up and down slowly, her hair tickling the side of her face.

Feeling secure that he wasn't going to be found out, he began oh-so quietly,

"_Better move _

_Cause we've arrived _

_Lookin' sexy_

_Lookin' fly _

_Baddest chick_

_Chick inside _

_DJ _

_Jam tonight _

_Spotted me _

_A tender thang _

_There you are_

_Come on baby _

_Don't you wanna _

_Dance with me _

_Can you handle _

_Handle me _

_You gotta do much better _

_If you're gonna dance with me tonight _

_You gotta work your jelly _

_If you're gonna dance with me tonight _

_Read my lips carefully, if you like what you see _

_Move, groove, prove you can hang with me _

_By the looks I got you shook up and scared of me _

_Buckle your seatbelt, it's time for takeoff _

_I don't think you're ready for this jelly_

_I don't think you're ready for this jelly _

_I don't think you're ready for this _

_'cause my body's too bootylicious for ya babe…"_

He rubbed his hand over her belly, smiling as the baby kicked and shifted.

Rogue woke, her voice thick with sleep. "John?"

"Hey…" He scooted back up the bed, kissing her cheek gently. "You okay?"

"What were you doing?" she asked as he tried to get himself comfortable again. She wrapped her arms around him (well, as best as she could without her belly getting in the way) when he finally settled down, resting her head on his chest, snuggling close.

He shrugged. "Just talking to the baby."

"He must like the sound of your voice because he wouldn't stop kicking…"

He pressed his lips against her hair, snaking an arm around her. "You always assume the baby's gonna be a boy."

"And you're gonna have to learn that I'm always right."

She felt the rumble of his laughter against her cheek, making her smile.

They spent the next few minutes discussing baby names, Rogue idly tracing the patterns on his shirt.

"I always liked the name Matthew, what do you think?" She waited for a reply but received none. She lifted her head slightly to look at him. "John?"

She propped herself up on her elbow. Leaning close to his sleeping face, she lightly rubbed a fingertip over his lips. "John Allerdyce, you think I don't hear you but I do and I have to say, you sing quite magnificently."


	4. Chapter 4

_John and Rogue go to the Med Lab for the first time_

--

"So…what can I do for you?" Hank asked kindly. He looked first to Rogue who opened and shut her mouth a few times in hesitation, then he looked to John who looked like he was literally sinking into his chair. "What seems to be the problem?"

Neither of them answered him so he waited patiently. He was taking a sip from his coffee when finally Rogue spoke up, the words tumbling out her mouth.

"I'M PREGNANT!"

Hank spewed out coffee that had been in his mouth just a second before, spraying mostly onto the paperwork he had on his desk. He coughed violently, choking on a mixture of coffee and saliva that got caught in his windpipe. When finally he was able to form words, he looked at the two teenagers sitting in front of him, hoping this was some kind of hazing ritual for the new guy at the X-mansion, and realized they were dead serious.

"Wha…? I don't… How did…? Wha…?" he stammered out. "Are you sure?"

"Unless five home pregnancy tests are wrong…yeah, we're sure," John muttered.

Hank just stared at John for a moment, then looked at Rogue who was fiddling with the tips of her gloves, than back at John who was now twitching his leg uncontrollably. "So…you're the father…"

John nodded curtly, not meeting Hank's eyes.

"You're able to touch her…without…"

Another curt nod.

It was like his brain was on overload and Hank was incapable of forming fully formed sentences. "But I thought… I don't understa… How did you…?"

"You know, for a dude who went to medical school and served the President, you sound like a fricking idiot…" John answered, sarcasm dripping from every word.

"John…" Rogue shushed him, gripping his hand in warning. Her attention went back to Hank who looked like he was still trying to grasp what was going on. "Shouldn't we do some kind of test, just to have like…official confirmation?"

"Uh…sure! Right!" But what he really wanted to do was ask a billion questions on how John was able to touch Rogue and wasn't she supposed to be seeing a certain Mr Drake and what were they doing having sex without protection, are they nuts? and…and…

No, no, he was supposed to be the professional here. He wasn't a gossipmonger like Jubilee, although it took everything in him not to act like her at that precise moment. "Why don't you two go into the examining room next door? I'll get the test and meet you in there."

Hank watched as John scrambled to his feet first and tried to help Rogue out of her seat like she was already plump and round with their child. She giggled as he grasped her by the elbow and hand, whispering if he was going to be this helpful for the next nine months. And if Hank hadn't been sitting right there, he wouldn't have believed it but there was an actual blush creeping up on John's cheeks.

_Holy crap…a child… Rogue… Pregnant… With John's child… Holy crap… _

_Man, I do sound like a fricking idiot…_

Hank snapped out of his reverie. He stood up, pointedly ignoring the coffee-splattered mess on his desk, and went in search of the pregnancy test.

Hank silently hoped he was there to see the reaction on Logan's face when he found out. It was going to be priceless.


End file.
